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A Demon's Lament-Halloween PG-13

 
I'm called monster, beast and villain,
Devil, brute and fiend.
When you are a Demon,
People can be quite mean.

It's not all fun and games,
You'd see it is hard work.
None are less looked up to.
You think we are just jerks.

It's hard to look like this-
With large horns and deep red skin.
With fangs that don't fit in my mouth
over sharp and jutting chin.

You can say I look unique, at best.
People run away and scream.
Can you imagine what that does
To a Demon's self esteem?

Don't get me started on the horns!
They get caught on everything!
Branches, doorways, spider webs,
Wind chimes and silly string.

There's no clothing made for us.
That's why we're fashion fails-
Hats won't fit misshapen heads,
Jeans have no holes for tails.

And I work in a real Hell hole.
That is a literal claim.
As bad as you think your office is,
At least there's no sulfuric flames.

The water cooler's always hot,
There is no central air.
We have these dumb stability balls
Instead of office chairs.

I work for a real Devil,
If you'll please excuse the pun.
No lunch breaks or paid time off-
Demon's work is never done.

You might think possession's fun-
Our favorite assignment?
Once again, you would be wrong-
Who likes that much confinement?

You people reek from the inside!
Wet and squishy, toes to throat!
What's worse than going into work?
That'd be working remote!

Get a new job?  Who'd hire me?
Walmart as a greeter?
Or study to be a CPA?
Or an assistant to St. Peter?

Who would hire Demon spawn?
It's easier said than done.
Politician is the only job
I could win if I did run.

But I couldn't work in politics,
It does not sit well with me.
Even Demons from the pits of Hell
Have some integrity.
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